COVID-19: Should I Reschedule My Wedding?
Let me preface this by saying, I’m truly so sorry you’re being affected by Coronavirus. I understand you’ve been planning this wedding for months if not years and it’s not something that can easily be changed. My goal for this post is to provide insight as an event industry professional about what your options are. I’m also choosing to focus on the things that I can control despite the fact that we’re living in an increasingly turbulent time.
After digging around for some time, I’ve found very few resourceful guides to help you make decisions about proceeding with your wedding. To be completely honest, there was a lot of projection of stress and frustration in some of the posts I’ve seen, and while I understand, we’re all feeling the weight of this pandemic, I’m not going to go there. This is meant to bring peace and guidance as we are counting down the days to your wedding.
I’m doing the best that I can in helping you navigate this time, so if I missed something or come off as insensitive, please send me an email, and I’d love to have a conversation with you.
So, if you’re getting married in 2020 and are feeling uncertain about how your wedding will be affected. Let’s talk about your options:
You’re hoping to keep your original date:
UPDATE (3/23) // ALL WEDDINGS REGARDLESS OF SIZE MUST BE CANCELLED UNTIL MAY 4TH DUE TO THE STAY AT HOME ORDER.
There is potential that this will be extended, continue to prepare to take action if need be.
While still practicing social distancing and proper sanitary procedures, elope with your closest family and friends (10 people maximum if held before March 31st. Less than 50 people until further notice and you MUST comply with CDC prevention measures found here.)
Plan on having a larger celebration with your guests in a few months! (bonus: you get to wear your wedding attire and glam up twice!)
You’re getting married in April-May of 2020:
The conversation of postponing your wedding should be happening now.
Prepare to shift your plans around to adhere to CDC recommendations or federal and local government mandates as time goes on. This may include but is not limited to: eloping on your scheduled day with fewer than 20 people, eloping and choosing a new date for a large reception, choosing a new location because your venue closed, or trimming down your guest list the said recommended guest count.
Contact your venue, planner, and photographer immediately. Work with them to find a new date that everyone is available for.
Once you’ve finalized a new date, send an update to your guests. If you have a wedding website, I’d recommend posting an update in there and then send out an email to your guest list, forwarding them to your website. Try to answer as many questions as you can in that update because the less people you have trying to reach you for info, the better.
Use my Google Spreadsheet page to stay organized as you narrow down a new date that aligns with vendors’ and family members’ availability.
Click the link above > Sign into your Google (if not already logged in) > Make a copy > Edit freely!
You’re getting married in June-July of 2020:
Ideally, it would be great to move forward without any changes, and depending on the date of your wedding, that could totally be possible! However, considering how rapidly things have changed over the past week, there is still a possibility that these restrictions could be extended. Stay informed via the CDC website regarding large events.
Keep the health of your guests in mind, specifically the elderly and immunocompromised, and include an option to chime into the wedding digitally via facetime, google hangout, married livestream, or zoom call.
Know that some of your guests may choose not to attend, and reassure them that that’s okay. In this time it’s critical to be understanding about the needs of others.
Prepare to shift some of your plans around to adhere to CDC recommendations or federal and local government mandates as time goes on. This may include: eloping on your scheduled day with fewer than 20 people or choosing a new location because your venue closed or your rescheduling to use that location for the postponed ceremony.
It’s perfectly appropriate to start the conversation with your vendors about what happens if this continues three months from now. I’m hoping they already contacted you discussing your options, but if they didn’t, ask!
Here’s an email template to get you started:
Hi [vendor name],
We wanted to touch base regarding our wedding later this year. We’re a bit uncertain of what will happen in the upcoming months and want to be prepared to make a decision that suits us best.
We reviewed our contract and understand that [insert summary of cancellation and rescheduling policy]. Is there any flexibility in that? If we do choose to reschedule, how long do we have to do that? Would you be open to us shifting to an elopement on our original date, and postponing the reception to a later date?
We’d love to see a list of available dates you have for the remainder of 2020 and possibly 2021, just in case.
Thanks [vendor name]! We appreciate you and hope you’re doing well!
[your names]
You’re getting married between August-December 2020
Again, it’s still perfectly appropriate to have the conversation with your vendors about what happens if covid restrictions continue into late 2020. See email template above.
However, I do not recommend beginning the postponement process if your date falls within this time period.
It’s important to make decisions during this time based off facts as opposed to fear. Each and everyday we are receiving more updates and new information on the virus so wait a few more weeks, stay hopeful, and then reevaluate your options.
You’re looking to cancel your wedding:
If you’re considering cancelling, I want to strongly encourage you to reconsider. Here’s why:
When you cancel, you run the risk of losing all the deposits you made. Vendors are much more likely to be flexible when you request to move the deposit to a new date, as opposed to canceling completely. Review your contracts and understand their policies!
I’m going to be completely transparent about this, when I say that the vendors you hired for your event are just humans who are just like you and they have families to provide for and bills to pay. It’s so important that we continue to be gracious and understanding towards one another, and my hope is that you and your vendors can come to an agreement if you do choose to cancel.
Check your wedding insurance, if you purchased insurance before the outbreak, you may be covered for some of the losses you could face during cancelling.
You’re in the beginning stages of planning:
You might not have much set in place, so I want to share some information to help arm you as you continue to plan during an uncertain time. Don’t let this virus keep you from planning. Instead, ask these questions to your vendors and make sure their responses align with what’s in their contract:
If my wedding can’t happen due to force majeure, what happens? Will you allow me to reschedule using the same retainer?
If I need to reschedule, due to the virus or not, what happens? Can I use the retainer for a new date?
If I cancel, is my retainer refundable?
At the end of the day, love is not cancelled. You’re marrying the partner of your dreams, your person, your best friend. The wedding is just the time and space to celebrate that love and while it may be a different date, location, and size, it’s important to focus on the real reason for your wedding. Stay hopeful.Lastly, please don’t worry about inconveniencing or upsetting loved ones if you do choose to reschedule. Instead focus on what you both need and do what’s best for you and your relationship.
Disclaimer: Seattle is my home base, and I focused on the current restrictions placed on King County. Please research the restrictions in the county your wedding will take place in for accurate measures put in place.
We are human, and we are resilient.
Helpful Sources:
CDC Mass Gathering Recommendations